Have you ever noticed how you could be feeling ok, just going about your day and then something happens to send your mood that was mediocre from the start, right into the toilet? You start feeling frustrated thinking about all that you do for everybody else and how ungrateful they are to not even acknowledge your efforts. Then you get overwhelmed thinking about how much time and energy you spend being "response-able" to your children, spouse, siblings, parents, friends, jobs, careers, and institutions. Now you feel hurt with tears running down your face and a knot in your throat thinking, "Is this all there is to my life?" Then by the end of this inner emotional tirade which lasted all of 5 minutes; you're angry, depressed, exhausted and lashing out with a vengence at anyone within earshot or venting furiously on Facebook for the rest of the day.
What just happened? It's like that one negative emotive seed multiplied exponentially and reduced you to an unstable, out of control, inconsolable ball of goo. Wow! Now what?
This is actually a great opportunity. It's an opportunity to CONNECT, TRANSFORM and EMPOWER yourself to Master Your Emotions and bring about the outcome that you desire. The negative emotions that you express are actually coded language for your true feelings. The senerio above demonstrated a kind of, "acting out", as children do. In that senerio, you were throwing an adult tantrum because you're disconnected from your true feelings. Because of this disconnect, you're not "able to respond" to your emotions in a productive way, leaving little room for Emotional Mastery.
So how do you move towards Emotional Mastery?
First you have to change your energy. So STOP whatever your doing, BE STILL, DEEP BREATH IN, DEEPER BREATH OUT. It took a little time to work yourself up into a frenzy so you have to allow yourself time to recover!
Now CONNECT with your emotions.
Identify what you are really feeling. For instance, feeling FRUSTRATED actually means that you are being challenged. You believe you could be doing better that you currently are. Feeling OVERWHELMED means that you're actually experiencing an imbalance in your life. It's time to re-evaluate what's important to you at this time. Feeling ANGRY actually means that you broke a promise...to yourself. You've allowed yourself to be dishonored by you or someone else. When you Identify your real emotions, you can acknowledge and accept them. Emotions are never wrong but they can be improved upon.
TRANSFORM by examination.
Ask questions. What do I really WANT to feel about this situation? What do I have to do or change within me to be able to feel this way? What is the lesson that this emotion is trying teach me about myself?
EMPOWER yourself to take action.
Know that you have the power to change the way you feel about a person, place, thing or situation. You can bring about the emotional change that moves you productively toward Emotional Mastery and the outcome that you desire.
When you make the commitment to Master Your Emotions, you become Pro-active instead of Re-active and you will see your life change for the better. You just have to be willing to do the work. I believe in you. Work it!
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